Decisions, Decisions…

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So as you all know I have been contemplating changing this blog and quite simply it is because I think I was a bit egotistical when I started it. I want to change the world, and I love being online and talking to people online; however the sheer amount of bullshit, hate, and bullying made me tired. So I tried creating a space where respect and common decency were the only two rules. While that part of the blog has been much more successful than I ever imagined it would be, I feel just a tad hypocritical with the title. I am not always tolerant. I don’t even want to be. Some things shouldn’t be tolerated, but addressed in a tolerant manner.

I actually picked the word tolerant because it really does have many meanings and can apply to many situations – but then I decided to define it here and feel like I failed at that because when I am not feeling all that nice – I don’t want to write it here because I think it detracts from the message rather than enhancing it. So when I am in a negative space, or want to write with abandon – I limited myself with a niche. Hence why I stopped writing everyday. However, writing everyday is my therapy, and having an audience whether you agree with me or not; is part of my personality. I love an audience. I am the quintessential “attention whore” and I actually like that about myself. I value the opinions of others even when I adamantly disagree with them. It is quite honestly how I learn and I LOVE to learn.

I guess what I am trying to say is that “Tolerant People” is a goal, it isn’t where I am currently – but what I would like to strive to be.  I would like to be more tolerant of myself, and those I interact with.

I am on an amazing and enlightening journey in my life right now. I am lost, scared and confused. I struggle with depression and alcohol abuse. After my most recent ‘freak out’ I realized that I HAVE to change. You know the saying that, “The definition of insanity is doing the same things over and over while expecting a different result.” Well, that has pretty much been my life. I keep making the same mistakes and bad choices. Everyone does that, but sometimes you get to a point in life where you are ready to stop doing that and ready to try something new in order to produce different results.

So I have decided that I am going to keep this blog, with its title intact. I am also going to keep the FB page but some of that content may change a little. I am no longer on a mission to change you my Dear Readers, but myself. If you can find some inspiration in that, or a kindred spirit wandering through life as blindly as I have been – then I encourage you to stick around.

I have always been open and honest here, and I will continue to do so. That’s just how I roll. I’m not always right.  I don’t always give good advice. I am just as broken as anyone else out there reading this. We are a country of broken, addicted, depressed, stressed out people who in all honesty need to find ways to help and support one another rather than judge those we deem worse off than ourselves.

So now the tolerance part of this blog is simply to learn to accept the things we cannot change, change the things we can, and gain the strength and wisdom to know the difference. An old prayer, with a new agenda.

So welcome to the new Tolerant People Blog. I hope you guys stick around, and I look forward to those who haven’t stopped by yet. For those of you who have been here all along, your support and encouragement are part of this change. Think of this as your page too, and feel free to say what you want when you want to say it.

8 thoughts on “Decisions, Decisions…

  1. Yes. Yes. Yes. I am now more convinced than ever that it was no accident I stumbled upon your blog. You are my kindred spirit twin! As my therapist recently said to me, it is quite grandiose to believe that I can change the world. Changing my grandiose thinking is the only way to feel better. Once again, you have expressed just about all the thoughts and feelings I’ve experienced over the past few months.

  2. Cyber hugs! I’ve got your back, dearest. I’m a big fan, though we usually argue, and I’ll always be here for you, cheering you on. You’re an amazing, and wonderful person. I’m proud to know you, and call you friend.

  3. I believe that when the pain exceeds the pleasure, it’s time to change. Looks like you’ve reached that point. It takes great courage to admit one needs to change, so kudos to you. Good luck on your journey, and I’ll be here to read and support you. 🙂

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